anniversary of wedding vs end of block test

What day is today?
guess what?today is my parent's anniversary of marriage!o.O....noe it for e first time,am i a bit....?hmmmm...better dont say abt myself...
well..this month s pocket money is....=p......lol.....a bit more than usual?hmmm...
beside tt,today also marks e end of my agony----block test!!!!!!!!!!
i was so happy n relaxed this afternoon after my CLL paper...n i wrote a continous 3 hrs in a fast mode n i think i didnt write as much as some ppl like xs n her classmate ....well,guess tt s e difference between art students n science students.for example,for one 20marks qn,xs n her classmate wrote 3 pages while me n xl onli wrote around 1 page-.-
my hand was realli aching at e end of e paper,think u can imagine....T.T...
n when i was thinking abt how to ans some of e qn.s,i raised up my head n saw zhanglaoshi smiling in a way makes me feel he feel v shuang looking at so many students writing so fast n working so hard for CLL paper!T.T....n i saw yelaoshi doing tt later on too!T.T....n e starting of e paper is also v ironic....>.<....zhanglaoshi n yulaoshi was discussing among themselves tt can start at 1....but they didnt announce it and assumed we noe!so in e end we started asking e teacher whether we can start 3 min past 1...n he said,"ya....started le."....well...no comment.....but still qite cute....haha
hmmm..then i n xs went to eat Marche...
ate rosti wif sausage and lamb shrank wif whipped potato....T.T....we already feel full after a few bites...haha...so we were basically sitting there observing ppl(so werid rite?lol)n waiting for each other to battle wif e food....in e end xs did excelletly in fighting wif e potato while me fighting wif lamb...hehe...but still left some potato n sausage untouched....
think ll not go there for a long time le...cos feel v sickening now....lol...n due to e voucher we have,we onli paid $2.70....o.o.....looks v funny.....but,marche v cheap hor?muhahahaha.....
e way we found it at suntec was v funny....shall not elaborate bah cos my hand aching still!>.<
then went to mango to buy tee...hehe....
came out find we lost our direction,haiz,this s e bad thing abt two directionless ppl walking together....
hmmm...but we managed to see a shuttle bus just on time it came...quite lucky...hehe...so we still ended up in cityhall mrt station...
quite tired now...
well...let me summarize e block test...
overall i dont feel v gd...especially for maths n phy bah...just feel they r e worst i did...
i put e bear s skirt on her head as hat,v style leh!hehe....creative thinking is necessary...
hmmm...tml service...
feel like it has been a long time since i last went...so quite longing for it bah...
tired now...sleepy now...thinking now...
of who?
hmmm...make a guess....haha
gd nitez!=)

its lame i noe...-.-

The sunset was long gone
darkness drawn in
i lifted my eyes
no stars or moon is in view
i can't find u
trembled n lost
im all alone
whr can i go?
all directions of blank darkness
whr should i go?
i cant feel ur presence
im all lone

shone upon me
u r back...

love my long hair...>.<

i was "patrol" my drawer just now when i saw quite a few things tt stir up my interests...haha
"Your ability I cannot dispute
Your success you hence can build
A superthy organized mind you possess
BUt sometimes a blur-blur Mengjie, I must confess
You are sometimes also quite thick-skinned & squeal quite a bit
But you remains forever my apple-faced,pineapple head."
haha....i thought mdm.ang was from science stream?>..<....
sometimes what determine whether we like a certain subject is e teacher teaching....
as far as noe,ppl in my class all likes chem but not phy...
n xs told me her class ppl all like phy instead of chem....n most of them do not take chem now...
whats e cause?haha...teachers...yeah....lol....

e second thing tt arouse my interest is 1 cd lh has given me as present on my birthday....
i didnt realise its v special at tt time but now when i re-look at it...its so unique and touching...T.T....

e last is also a cd...but this s a photo album....suddenly realised i have so many cds contains photos...haha

my left eye is v nanshou>.<
T.T...
T.T
who can help me?T.T

i love my hair!oh my=x....lol.....
but i prefer last time de v long hair....though someone disagree...>.<....

r u ready for a long journey?

i have been reading my diary since yesterday...
i read e first half of it last night and e second half today...it shows a clear difference in thinking n feeling abt everyday's life....

"let bygones be bygones!i dont' like to see people to be sad.WOrse is that they pretend like nothing has happened and pretend to be truely happy."

this forwarded msg inside has reminded me lots of misery memory....i just hate to be lied by e others...n whats ur right to ask me those things now?haiz....emotions r taking control of me....

hmmm...after reading it,i have a fresher mind...

i have learnt lots of thing through experiencing things...this is growing process...
n i believe every human being is given equal amount of happiness and challenges in life....but what makes ppl different is e way they take things....some ppl try to search for happiness and treasure it....they ll use these happiness to balance e sadness and even outnumber them...their life is brightened...
well...sometimes when im upset,i ll tend to have negative mind and tend to think things in a bad way.While i have learnt tt different mind ll make e same things feel differently,so i tried to set my mind back to a positive way whenever im upset...hope i could master tt in e near future=)

well...to think abt it,after such a long time,i have not quarrelled severly wif u even for once...this s great.some may say tt quarrelling makes ppl closer...but not all e times,isnt it?there r so many more important things in life tt worth our attention and energy...n we ll stay as support for each other,wont we?
to think abt it,i have not tt much strong emotions towards things nowadays...but isnt it a sign of maturity?n this is more precious bah...e v true feeling does not need to be strong but pure...thinking of u in any time,staying wif u without much words is comfortable as well...

love is something imaginery...all love ll decolorised after times,when tt time comes,we ll wonder have we ever had love towards this person before....so e more important and hence precious thing is we feel happy and comfortable wif this person s presence...tts when e time u can realise u two has actualli become one person literally,u understand this person so much and u r so used to his presence tt u cant be separated....

one ll tend to grow more mature when he or she experienced more things...im no longer a girl who ll think i ll be wif this person forever for sure....but i do hope so....but everything depends on how we treat it....
its going to be a long journey,r u ready?

cip+service=going to sleep soon....

"U r out almost every day and u r onlining all e time i saw u at home...c how s ur coming block test..."......
haiz....i dont understand y...but its always more stressed when my mom said it instead of i noe it myself...
y do we always live for what e others feel?ans:this is life.... response:sad+stress=miserable....

im wondering y ppl r so fake somtimes...u can try to act v gd to this person until v real even though u dont feel like doing so...o.Ohmmmm....life again....haha

kk....shall talk abt today's adventure...

17th June 2006...
01:00 fell asleep
zzzzzzzzzzzz.........................
06:15 woke up
06:25 got up
07:30 got out of room
08:15 reached Raffles mrt station(someone said i ll be late in a v sure tone-.-........though all e others were already there waiting for me but i was not tt late>.<)
08:30 ate mcmuffin and milo provided by ABN bank...haha....i went to do cip there today....its quite nice lah...we stayed at those kind of conference/meeting room wif air con and v nice setting....basically e enviornment is v gd...then we just stayed inside e room waiting for 4 grps of youngsters came(each grp consist of around 10 ppl)...what we did is to just show them how to write their name n all those craps lah...hehe..even i can guide,so u could c its quite crap lah....hmmm...we got 5 hrs cip record though we did less than tt....n what we got for lunch is cool....pizza hut....2 large pepsi for 6 of us....3 large pizza...3 family platter and 3 garlic breads...o.O....of course we didnt finish all cos tts too much....o.O....haha....we still did t-shirt decoration and beads making...then e token of appreaciation we recieved is also v nice n useful....lol..

15:00 went to service....
today s service is Father's day special...
its great...
we had worship followed by spelling bee re-match...one of e guy is quite chubby....v cute!!!!!!!!cutie....
then there was this drama show....v funny...
plus....today s preaching was v meaningful....i was tearing for most of e time...n realli approaching crying for a few times...but i controlled..yet there was still one time tear rolled down my cheeks....T.T
then went to eat KFC after service....3 meals of fastfood in a day....Mc...pizza hut....KFC...T.T...wanna cry le...

im feeling sleepy....>.<
shall stop here....
gd nitez=)u r already sleeping le....sweet dream to u!

taken from somewhr...

God, give us grace to accept with serenity the things that cannot be changed, courage to change the things which should be changed and the wisdom to distinguish the one from the other.　　~Reinhold Niebuhr

date wif my wife wif me waiting for her again....

i have just realised tt my sentence constructing skill is a bit stagnant nowadays...T.T...sad...sobbing...my gp....T.T....
anw,went out wif my wife yesterday after a long long time...so felt realli great..
tts y i wear until v mature...muhahahaha...she said de....then she wore e shirt we bought together last time...i have yet to wear it cos almost half of e back is exposed although e shirt looks nice lah...hehe...
we shopped a long time for e others....
meant to eat mashee(how to spell?T.T) de...but its down for rennovation....T.T.....so ended up eating KFC cos she was v hungry already...lots of fat consumed!!!!!!>.<....
full and satisfied,we strolled along e orchard road and finally its time for shopping for ourselves!haha...but actualli we didnt feel like buying anything at first de cos long time didnt buy things..lol
but still things attracted our attention...i bought one two quarter(is there any such phrase?haha)pant and she bought one belt...lol...
on e mrt back,xs was asking me whether i feel heartpain...
hmmm...nope bah...i ll feel heartpain if i bought tt for myself..haha

okie...tt sums up my day...
i was so tired before i slept n i woke up at 7 plus this morning!>.<
lol...
feel v stressed now...cos hasnt realli do my revision...yet this week is full planned except tml when i can revise...haiz....

7 basic needs of every soul...

i slept before 12 last night...
haha...then woke up at 9 today...but how come i have headache after breakfast?
so weird...T.T
"weird" this word remind me of something...-.-.....
girls r not weird at all..>.<

yesterday learnt several things...

SOUL defines PERSONALITY
every soul has 7 basic needs...
-spirituality
-love
-self-esteem
-knowledge
-security
-aesthetic
-freedom

"love is something every soul needs,there is nothing ashamed abt searching for love.."

this sentence struck me...because it remind me of what i have written in e e-mail at tt time...
whr did i get this mind concept from?
after 1 cgm bah....whr i realli feel refreshed and happy,i donno y at tt time but now i understand its because of God's presence...
He has showed me e way...
believing GOd has plan for us is e right choice to made.....=)

we ll walk a long way...

y must he be so fierce?
haiz....my mood was being spoiled...
but yet i didnt let my emotion surface...is tt call e sign of grown up?
i dont wanna grow up!
n i dont like lots of adult...maybe its e environment tt makes them become in certain way bah...

nvrm...drop this bah...

recieved a msg in e afternoon which makes my jaw drop...o.O....
yet it makes me =)....

God has realli answered my call and blessed us....

fate is between us......I was approaching exhausted state at LEP camp and u changed to a different self in e nick of time....im recharged once more...

but there is some feeling in me now,which i cant explain....
......

dance wif joy...

Heart pounding is a magical melody...
its powerful,steady and fast
yet i felt soothing,comforting and peaceful when hearing it and feeling it...

Small gal sat in front of her desk,empty minded...

e world stopped its motion for she want this moment to stay...
However,nothing can disrupt e functioning to e nature so she captured it in her heart...
locked it and nvr let it go...

she was wondering,how to identify love?
Love...
is when u feel this person is e nicest looking one among all e others...
is when u feel v close to this person,u trust him a lot and u accept all his shortcomings..
is when u identify and appreaciate his talents...
is when u praise abt little things he did to e others and u feel happy doing tt...
is when u simply want tt person...
is when u r willing to give him freedom...
is when u adore tt person and feel sad on his behalf and willing to do sacrifice..
is when u want a hand hold,a hug or a kiss...

looking out through e window,she cant find any star or moon but she already has her star and moon wif her...

e feeling she has nvr felt is surrounding her...
its so different...
and she realised she s grown up....

nose de pimple bleeding again...T.T
n im eating my dinner...o.O...at this hour...lol
going to sleep soon...tml meet my wife!=p

im blessed...=P

I fear it's very wrong of me
And yet i must admit
I want one special friend
who indisputably
like me much more than all the rest
Who's always on my side
Who never cares what others say
who lets me come and hide
within his shadow in his house
it doesn't matter where
who lets me simply be myself
who's always always there



sometimes i ll be wondering y other gals have so many ppl wooing them...well...with e mind of a girl,i ll be a bit jealous over tt n also feel unfair...

but i have came to realise tt not all e girls r as blessed as me bah...
what more can i ask for when i always own e love of e peolpe i love...
its a blessing itself...
n i take appreaciation for tt..i dont cheat others' feeling...n im devouted to e person i love..

girls,we need someone we love,who loves us also...
love s a nature n relationship is a study...
as time passes,u will learn n grow..
u ll understand certain words n actions ll hurt e other side..so u tried to change.
wif changes,u become a better person..
n not onli inside,we change our outlook as well..
we ll become more attentive to our outlook cos we want 2 present e best..
its nothing wrong wif tt as long as we didnt hide our true self inside,isnt it?
n people in e World look at out outlook instead of our inner self cos we r all human beings...people who dress well ll have more chances in getting e job in an interview,people who dress well ll leave better impression to e others...this s an undeniable fact...so whatwrong wif changing ur outlook?haha..so girls..there s nothing wrong but more benefits so add more cofnidence to urself bah!

e blessed girl need to mug...though she doesnt want...
but try bah...>.<

life

just wondering y s there so many things in life which ll make ur emotion turns,either to bad or gd...
this is life...
how to get unaffected?or simply try to hide ur emotion?
hmmm...life life life....

random

its another new day...went to emerge...talentime n conference..
tts great..
especially i teared a bit at one moment during e worship...

no one r perfectly nice gal or guy...
we r all nice in one way or another...
so just try to change those areas u r not nice at...

i was feeling a bit discouraged earlier on n i felt my feelings r not as strong as last time,its fading away..
but something proved me wrong last night...

i love u, Lord...
i love u, small boy...

LEP camp...

yoh!im finally back from LEP camp....
hmmm..shall do a rough intro. of this camp....
Aim: raise future pig of high quality,with extra ordinary patient and endurance,plus able to find joy out of no where.
Mission:breakfast,talk,tea break,talk,lunch,talk,tea break,talk,dinner,talk,sleep.

Well...this camp has held v successfully in achieving its aims!

i have learnt how to sleep in different kinds of positions n ways during talks from lots of ppl...o.O
tts simple amazing...
n our life s just v tui2fei4....-.-......play bridge at night n sleep during talks in e day time...

im eating instant noodle now....T.T....it suddenly remind me of e little gal gathering on e first 2 night...especially e second night when me,xs,fj,yt,xj n yy, e 6 of us gathered at one room eating cup noodle,lunchon meat,egg,apple n porridge.we started to have little gal chat after tt until 2 am plus...we might stayed up longer if its not tt some ppl came...-.-

hmmm...i have found out abt a lot of things bah...which r said by all e 5 of them...at different timing n e amazing thing is tt they didnt noe e others have said it..
maybe these things r in my sub conscious all e time,its just tt i did not want to acknowledge them...
xs said my endurance s patience s super...well....i dont deny....since s aim of e camp is to develop patience...(haha...seems like no link but nvrm)

then went for night walk on e 3rd night..T.T....so tired...

n alst night we have stage show by different grps...i did e job of narrator in my grp...cos i was late for almost 2 hrs for e discussion...>.<...hehe..me,xs n fj were chatting at sudent lounge...o.o.....lol

hmmm...one said my voice s dia...T.T...my voice was mature k?
one said my voice s sweet n clear....=p....thanks ,my instructor...
n one said its scary to hear my voice in an enlarged version...-.-

jj s mass dance s cute in a crazy way n our school s cute in a chun2pu3 way....lol...
think all 4 jc s dance v cute....lol...

this morning during e 2 hr talk,i was sleeping for e first45 min....stoneing for e next 20 min...n went wif xs to toilet plus eating for e next 30min...n during our eating time,saw wang lao shi...T.T.....


went to do some amazing thing wif xs this afternoon...hahahaha....

nvrm...

just suddenly feel tt its not right to go for cip with a wrong attitude bah...
hmmm below s a private conver. (they spoke too loud..-.-)i have heard during e camp.
"...we r short of ppl to go for cip,u can come?....."
"no...i dont want.i dont like to do flagday..."
well...i also dont like to do flag day...=p
haha...tts y i went for cip like painting for autism school...

though i have to contribute time n money, God did award me spiritually...=)...i was feeling happy...

feeling tired le...though i seem to have lots of thing in mind...haha...
shall stop here today...
...